MTV's Top Twenty Countdown
by aoshi02780
Summary: Welcome to MTV's Top Twenty Countdown, with your host.....Okina! And there will also be a special guest on this show. Who is it? Come on and find out as we show you the biggest twenty songs in America!
1. Chapter 1

MTV's Top 20 Countdown!

By: Kelli St. Pierre……………….sadly I do not own Rurouni kenshin…

"Welcome, welcome to MTV's top twenty countdown, and I am your host….Okina!"

(Applause is heard from the audience while Okina tries to quiet them down.)

"Now before we start our countdown, there's a special guest who will be with us today and that's no other than……..Hiko Seijuro!"

(The audience now roars as a big man with a coat on, walks onto the stage. He stands right next to Okina, while he ignores the kissing sounds from the girls.)

"Now then Hiko, welcome to the MTV's top twenty countdown. So how've you been old pal?"

"I'd be fine if I wasn't here right now, but if you insist...I'm fine",Hiko grunted.

"Well that's great to here!"

"By the way Okina, do you have any sake with you by any chance?"

"Sadly no since there's no drinking while on TV."

"…..figures….I'm on a lame ass show and I don't even get any sake…..how much worse can it get…."

"Well in any event, its time to get on with the countdown!"

( The audience cheers louder as a big screen TV came on behind Okina and Hiko as Okina handed Hiko a piece of paper.)

"Now Hiko, would you have the honor of announcing this week's number twenty song"!

"Whatever…"

( Okina hands him the piece of paper. As Hiko unfolds the paper, the audience is getting more anxious that their even leaning in more in their seats. Finally Hiko unfolds the paper and he looks disgusted with the paper.)

"Okina"

"yes Hiko"

"Remember when I said things couldn't get any worse".

"Oh right, yes I remember, but why you ask?"

" Because it just did…."

(Okina was curious and peaked to see what the note said, His eyes bulged out and he fell to the floor laughing crazy.)

"HA HA HA HA HA HAAA HAAA…….NO WAY……HA HA HA…I HAVE TO SEE THIS!"

( The crowd, still doesn't know who it is and is still patient to find out. Hiko looks at the audience as he says in clenched teeth….)

"This…..week's….number…twenty….is…."

(He looks again, seeing if he should actually say the name written there.)

"My…..baka….deshi…………Kenshin Himura…with..his song called…' Yeah'.."

( The audience, finally knowing what it is, cheers as the TV screen turns on and shows the video to 'Yeah'. The audience watches as Kenshin dances on the dance floor with a chick, going up and down…side to side. Hiko looks disgusted and grunts…)

"Next time my baka deshi comes home…..he is so going to get it……"

(By now the song has ended and the audience cheers as Okina has the microphone and says…)

"Well that was our number twenty this week…..by Himura! And Hiko….if I might ask…weren't you Himura's master?"

( The audience looks at Hiko in curiosity….)

"Yes….he is my apprentice…."

"Well please share, is there anything you like to tell us about him?"

"Well…he wasn't easy to train that's for sure…since that idiot didn't stop wetting the bed until at least 14."

( The audience roars with laughter as Okina back on his own back…..cracking up laughing as Hiko continues….)

"Yea..and that's not all….when he finally stopped wetting the bed, a couple of days later….a boy asked him out cause he thought my idiot was a girl…"

( The audience is now dieing as there are tears in their eyes just like Okina. Finally after quiet some time….Okina….finally gets up and says…)

"Well that was very interesting Hiko thank you.."

"No problem….there's nothing more I would rather do than make fun of my apprentice……especially now…"

"Well there you have it folks, your number twenty on this weeks countdown…..but stay put cause were going down straight until we hit number one…..so stay here on MTV's top twenty countdown!

"Jesus….where does my baka deshi meet these people….."

Okay guys this is really important, THIS HAS BEEN ON BEFORE! The reason for this is that somehow while I was grounded for that long period of time ( which I'm sorry about and will make it up to u), when I went back to my file, only this story was gone from my website. Luckily, I have saved the chapters on my computer so I can just paste them back on.

So if you have read this story already so far, then I suggest you wait and don't read the chapters until the new one comes. I promise that I will make this up to u somehow and please don't kill me for this and I hope you guys do keep on reviewing. Bye for now……..:)


	2. Chapter 2

Top Twenty Countdown

By: Kelli St. Pierre………………..sadly I do not own Rurouni Kenshin

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"And Welcome back to the top twenty countdown, I your host…Okina…along with Hiko Seijuro!"

(The audience is cheering loudly again as Hiko puts a hand to his forehead and says…)

"Oh geeze were back on already…..I didn't even get to have any sake yet …."Hiko grunted.

"Come now Hiko, don't you wanna know who's number one like we all do?"

"The day when I care who's number one is the day I turn gay like my baka deshi."

(The audience laughs as Okina laughs as well. Okina finally calms himself down and pulls out another piece of paper from his pocket and says…)

"Alright then I'll read this week's number nineteenth song".

(Okina unfolds the paper and his eyes bulged out from his sockets. Hiko is thanking god didn't read it, as the audience is again curious.)

"Ladies and Gentleman, the nineteenth song this week is none other than…………..Kamatari Honjou with her song (coughs)…his song..(coughs)..'Theses boots are made for walkin'!"

"This doesn't sound good"Hiko grunts.

(The audience cheers loud as the big screen TV again turns on behind Okina and Hiko. The video starts with a car zooming in and then stops. A woman comes out and says….)

"Are you ready boots…"

"I thought I'd never say this but….that girl scares me." Hiko says to himself.

(The song now plays in a bar with the woman dancing around and getting slapped in the ass. Hiko looks confused at the screen….thinking about something….)

'_Were have I seen her before_….'Hiko thinks to himself.

(By now the woman is washing the car with soap and only wearing a bikini. Okina,who was looking at her the whole time with his mouth open, see's that its actually a guy and screams….)

"OH MY GOD IT'S A GUY!"

"SHHH SHHH SHUT UP!"

"….I swear…my baka deshi must have a club or somethin for gay guys."

(Okina looks and see's the crowd yelling for him to be quiet. He sits down on the floor with his face down. Hiko is still puzzling where he's seen her before as the video winds down and is over.)

"…..well…that's…our…nineteenth…..song…on our…countdown…this week…" Okina softy says, still with his head down.

"Now I remember! That's that wacko he/she that was their when I fought Fugi. Dam…I feel bad for you Okina…."

"Oh…dear god….I think…I'm…turning….like ..Aoshi…now."

" You mean that Icicle is gay?"

"I…am…to…assume….he..is.."

"Well, I wouldn't be surprised if that chunk of ice is gay….oh well, these gay guys probably got from my baka deshi….."

(The audience was watching the conversation with blank looks since they never knew of the Shishio incident. Okina is still sitting with his head down as Hiko waits for Okina to say anything else.)

"Umm…Okina…"

"………."

"Well…ah…since were not gonna get anything out of him for a while,…um…this was the week's nineteenth song..so….get out of here and piss off…I guess…"

(The audience looks at Hiko blankly and Hiko just stares back.)

"I need a new job…."Hiko grunts.

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Yea, im not sure if ill get all of these chapters in on one day since u all should no what im talking about from the info in chap. 1. So in the other chapters won't say anything until I get to the new one.


	3. Chapter 3

"MTV's Top Twenty Countdown"

By: Kelli St. Pierre………………..sadly I do not own Rurouni Kenshin

-

* * *

"And welcome back to MTV's to-"

"Will you stop that already Okina",HIko grunted

"Stop what"

"Saying the same thing over again…'Welcome back to MTV's Top Twenty Countdown'….we all know what this place fucking is, we don't need you to remind us."

"Well I'm sorry that you feel that way Hiko, but I must…it's my job."

"Then you should get a new job"

"Anyways, like I was saying, welcome back to MTV's Top Twenty Countdown.!"

(An applause is heard from the audience again as people in the crowd had gotten snacks during the break.)

"Alright now let's get down to business, next up is number eighteen this week as I pull it out.

(Okina pulls out something, that definitely isn't, a piece of paper.)

"Okina is that a condom you just pulled out?", Hiko said disgustedly.

"Umm……..eh..Eh…..maybe…",Okina weakly says as he stuffs the condom back into his pocket, making sure he wouldn't pick it out again.

(The audience of course, laughed their heads off while this was happening and started asking questions.)

"When did you use it? Was it last night?", some guy who looked eighteen asked.

"…um….eh…_maybe_..", Okina said dryly.

"Oh dude how old was the chick man!", another guy asked who looked twenty-two.

"Um….maybe about like….um…nineteen..", Okina said softly.

"Oh I'm sorry Okina, we can't hear you," Hiko teased, knowing full well that they all heard it from the looks of their faces."

"She….was..nineteen.." Okina said it a little louder.

"I'm sorry I still can't hear you"

"SHE WAS FRIGGEN NINETEEN!"

(The audience, who knew what he was saying the whole time, asked more questions.)

"Ew dude, aren't you a little too old to be doing that", a girl asked this time who was actually nineteen too.

"Who me, 'The great Okina' is never too old!"

"Yea well, come next to me, and I'll kick your balls oldie", the same girl said.

(The audience laughed louder this time and Okina had to think of something to turn this around. He then took out the right piece of paper this time and announced…)

"Hey, do you all wanna know what this week's number eighteen is or not!"

(The audience all nodded their heads. Okina started waving the paper when he said it and the audience was mimicking his movement with their heads. Okina then moved the paper left to right very slowly and the audience did the same. Okina was going to keep on doing this, but saw the annoyed look on Hiko's face and decided to do it on a later time.)

"Alright, this week's number eighteen song this week is….none other than……………Kanryuu Takeda with his song 'She bangs'!"

(The audience cheer as the TV turns on again to show the video. The audience watches with awe as Hiko gets bored and starts to count sheep, hoping it will make him fall asleep.)

"One sheep….two sheep…….three sheep…."

(Knowing that it wasn't working, Hiko started to count….)

"One sake……two sake……three sake….four…sak…..fiv…sa.."

(Soon enough, Hiko fell asleep, even when he is still standing. Okina all the while, is making sure the girls he's looking at on the TV, are actually real girls this time. When the video is over, the TV turns off and is back behind Okina and a sleeping Hiko.)

( Okina then speaks into the microphone while Hiko snores loudly)

"Now that (snores) was this (snores) week's (snores) eighteenth song (snores)", Okina said over Hiko's snores.

(The audience cheers loudly, but as loudly as Hiko's snores. The audience looks at hiko in awe at how loud he snores.)

"Oh…my..god..", A girl started who looked fourteen," He looks so cute!"

(Okina had no idea what the girl was talking about since Okina thought it was highly annoying that Hiko fell asleep during his show

"You call this cute! He snores so loudly that it seems like he's related to big foot or somethin, not to mention he looks like one at that."

(The audience laughs as Okina then had a mischievous smile on his face. Okina opened Hiko's mouth a little wider and then told the audience…)

"Alright you all, who wants to play a game!"

(Everyone in the audience raised their hands which made Okina continue…)

"Alright, the game is to use your chips that you have with you all, and to throw it so it goes in Hiko's mouth."

(The audience cheered loudly as they agreed and liked this game. So they started throwing chips at Hiko One at a time. They all hit Hiko's shoulders though and nowhere close to his mouth. Then guy from the audience threw all of his chips at Hiko and ten of them went in his mouth. Before anybody moved or said anything, they watched hiko. He moved a little and said things randomly…)

"….eh…aa….hmm…sake…hmm…chips…hmm…….CHIPS!"

(Hiko then woke up quickly and looked at himself which he was covered in chips. He looked to the audience who all had their hands in their laps whistling to themselves like nothing happened at all. He then just shook himself off of the chips and said..)

"So what part of this lame ass show did I miss?"

"Well Hiko, all we did was watch this week's number eighteenth song and waited patiently for you to wake up", Okina said sweetly.

"Who was this week's number eighteen again."

"Oh it was Kanryuu Takeda with his song called 'She bangs'."

"Oh…wasn't that guy a crack attic or something?"

"Oh no he was an opium dealer."

"So, it's the same god dam thing."

(While Okina and Hiko argue, the audience looks to one back and forth with their heads.)

"Yea well you know what, I think Kanryuu whatever should stick his opium and crack up his god dam ass!"

"Well thank you Hiko and, oh gosh look at the time. Ladies and Gentleman its time to take another break as we roll on with the countdown. I your host Okina, says stay tune and our guest Hiko says….."

"I going to get some sake so fuck off"

"Eh well…..stay tune to MTV's Top Twenty Countdown!", Okina says weakly.


	4. Chapter 4

"MTV's Top Twenty Countdown"

By: Kelli St. Pierre…………………..sadly I do not own Rurouni Kenshin

* * *

"Now welcome back to the Top Twenty Countdown"!

"Here we go again….", Hiko grunted.

(The audience cheers as they have new snacks and drinks with them. Hiko and Okina are still standing on stage as Okina announces…)

"Alright now let's get crackin shall we!"

"You know what, I think I like you better when you were quiet during the Kamatari incident", Hiko said.

(Okina ignores that response by Hiko and continues on as the crowd cheers louder. Okina pulls out a piece of paper out of his pocket and begins to unfold it. When he finally is done unfolding it, he says…..)

"Alright, this week's number seventeenth song is...none other than Makoto Shishio with his song called 'Candy Shop'!"

(The audience cheers loudly as the same TV as always, turned on as the video began. Hiko, for once, was interested in this video cause he actually finally see who this 'Makoto Shishio ' was that his baka deshi was talking about. Okina was just looking at the girl's ass the whole time; when her ass went up his head went up and when her ass came down, his head came down. The audience just listened to it and some danced to it. The video finally was over and Hiko and Okina then took the stage again. Okina then announced….)

"There you have it folks, this week's number seventeenth song!"

"OH COME ON!"

(Okina and everyone else looks at Hiko for his outburst and Hiko continues….)

"Do you mean that my baka deshi had trouble dealing with a mummy the whole time? I teach him the ultimate technique and nearly risking my life, and for what…for a mummy….he's more of a girl than I thought."

"Um, Hiko…Shishio is tougher than he looks and was a huge threat to Japan".

"Yea yeah yea, do you know how many times I've heard that story. To me, this Shishio looks like a little mama's girl. Not to mention that poor ass-wipe probably couldn't get a girlfriend by any chance."

"Um, actually Hiko…Shishio did have a girlfriend…her name was Yumi Komagata".

"Well then she most definitely must have been a blonde then".

(The audience all the while is just looking back and fourth as always since Hiko and Okina always fight.)

"Anyways you might think today is over cause we just announced this week's number seventeenth song, but guess what…

"Oh I can't wait for this…", Hiko grunts.

(The audience also says what and Okina announces.)

"Today is a….Double Day!"

"Oh that was a shocker…..', Hiko says sarcastically.

(The audience is confused by this so okina explains more of it.)

"What that means is that not only will we say this week's number seventeenth, but also this week's number sixteenth as well!".

"Oh jesus no, one number is already enough!", Hiko yells.

(But the audience screams louder than ever and Okina has to even wave his hands to get his attention back.)

"Alright now that we have that settled, it's time to read this week's sixteenth song!"

(Okina then pulls out a piece of paper and starts to read it…)

"Alright this week's number sixteenth song is-"

(Right when Okina was about to say it, the lights suddenly turn off. Screaming is heard from the audience and Okina as Hiko just stands there and folds his arms across his chest.)

"Finally this show is starting to get interesting", Hiko said curiously, as it was still dark out.

"Hiko! Hiko where ever you are that comment was not funny and as for everyone else, stay in your seats. The light should come on in a few minutes".

(As the audience sits back in their seats, Okina tries to find a soft spot on the floor to sit on, but what he grabs isn't the floor but is….)

"OWWWWWWW……..MY NUTS!" Hiko screams loudly.

"Oops…sorry Hiko..eh…eh..", Okina apologized.

"I'LL GIVE YOU SORRY!

(The audience hears tumbling and banging from the floor as it was still dark and they couldn't see at all. They then hear…..)

"OWWW….OHH MY NUTSS!

"That's what you get for grabbing mine!"

"I never meant to grab your and even if I did, I never kicked you there…..twice!"

( Suddenly the lights turn back on and the audience finds Hiko standing though is slouched over with one hands on his nuts as Okina is lying on the floor grabbing his own as well. Hiko gives him a hand and pulls him up to his feet, though Okina slouches over as well. Luckily Okina didn't lose the piece of paper and found it on the floor. He slowly, kneels down to pick it up and slowly stands back up. He then announces..)

"Anyways back to what I was saying before this all happened, this week's number sixteenth song is…..Yahiko Myojin with his song called 'Let me hold you'!"

"Oh is that my baka deshi's apprentice or something".

(The audience cheers loudly as the TV comes up again and starts the video. A car pulls up and Yahiko comes out with a chick and enters a house. The music then starts and Yahiko dances with the chick, though to Hiko he looks real pathetic. Okina is, once again, looking at the chick Yahiko is accurately dancing with. The video then is over and Hiko and Okina is back on the spotlight.)

"And that was this week's number sixteenth song!"

( The audience cheers loudly but then quiets down as they hear Hiko laugh. Everyone looks at Hiko confused and he say's….)

"Ha hah ha hah ha….wow that kid really needs to learn how to danse..I can see how he's my baka deshi's apprentice…..they both suck at dancing."

"Well come now Hiko, you must give the boy credit…..he's only nine".

"Yeah, and that's what makes it so friggin hilarious. Not to mention that kid probably doesn't even get about half of the words he said during that song."

(The audience laughs at that and so does Okina as Hiko continues on.)

"I remember that kid alright, I actually saved his ass from Fuji. He should have thanked me for saving him, but no what does he do…..he complains…just like how my baka deshi does every since I raised him. I wouldn't be surprised if he still wets the bed since my baka deshi didn't stop until fourteen".

(The audience cracks up as much as Okina as Hiko starts to stretch out his muscles. All the girls, of course, look in awe as he does so; some even drool without even knowing it. Okina then says after settling himself from laughing.)

"Alright so that was our not only our seventeenth song, but our sixteenth song as well! But stay tune cause were gonna keep on going till we get to number one!"

"Oh jesus, and were only at number sixteen….how much more can I take……."


	5. Chapter 5

MTV'S Top Twenty Countdown

By: Kelli St. Pierre…………………..sadly I do not own Rurouni Kenshin

* * *

"Welcome, welcome back to the Top Twenty Countdown"!

(The audience cheers loudly, as they still have there snacks with them in their seats.)

"Is it me, or is this deja'vu?" Hiko said to himself softly.

"Now, did you all miss your sexy host Okina!"

(The audience was about to answer, but then they saw Hiko shaking his head no behind Okina. So the audience mimicked Hiko's moves as Okina looked strangely at the crowd. Okina turned his head back to look at Hiko, to see him standing there with his arms around his back.)

"What the hell are you looking at fuck face?"

"Nothing, just seeing something", Okina replied.

(When Okina turned back around, Hiko put a sign up that said 'Yell Hiko is sexy!' on it. And well, the audience did just that……)

"HIKO IS SEXY!'

(Okina turned back to Hiko who pretended to look just as confused as Okina did.)

"What? Don't look at me, how am I supposed to know why there acting this way? Besides Okina, there just saying what's true here, and that's what counts right…."

"Oh well, but back with the countdown. Do you know what time it is?"

"Time for me to take a shit?" Hiko grunted

"Nope, but close, it's time to review our songs we have so far!"

"Hmm, I'm sorry Okina, but I just don't see how that comes close to taking a shit."

"Anyways, it's time to review our songs shall we…."

(The big screen T.V comes back to the stage as it shows the number twenty song by kenshin with his song called 'Yeah'. Hiko looked away, disgusted with his apprentice. But it was completely turned to the nineteenth song, which was Kamatari Houjou with her (his) called 'These boots are made for walkin'. Okina looked away, disgusted as well but for a different reason. He didn't want any more of those nightmares again. Then it changed to the eighteenth song which was Kanryuu Takeda with his song called 'She bangs'.)

"Hmm, crack attic…" Hiko grunted out.

"Opium dealer…" Okina whispered back.

"God, fuck you man"

(The video then changed to the seventeenth song which was Makoto Shishio with his song 'Candy Shop'. Hiko then looked angry at the guy, since he taught his apprentice the secret technique all for this mummy guy.)

"God, I should have known my idiot would have asked me for the technique, for someone as stupid as this".

(The video the changed to the sixteenth song which was Yahiko Myojin with his song 'Let me hold you'.)

"Ha, hah, hah, hah, my idiots apprentice is always good for a good laugh."

(The T.V then turns off and is rolled off the stage as Okina and Hiko now take up the stage.)

"Well there you have it folks, that's a recap of all the songs so far. But now is the time I announce the fifteenth song!"

"God, I was hoping you would forget about that".

"Hmm, Hiko, you should know that the great Okina never forgets!"

"Hmm, I'd like to see that very much."

"Anyways, this week's fifteenth song is…."

(Okina reached into his pocket and brought out a piece of paper. He opened it up and his eyes bulged out. Hiko took note of this and had a mischief smile on, as he looked to see what it was. He then cracked up laughing and snatched the paper from Okina's hands, as he was showing it to the audience.)

"This folks is what I would call, 'Okina in the nude'."

(As Hiko said, Okina was indeed nude in the picture. Though he was only about eight in the picture, and was in a bathtub with a rubber ducky. The audience saw the picture and then burst out laughing, drinking in the sight of the picture. Okina was miserably trying to snatch the picture out of Hiko's hand. But Hiko would move his hand up each time Okina jumped up. The audience noticed this and followed their movements, moving their heads up and down continuously.)

"Now this is what I call a show", Hiko said to himself.

(But Okina finally got the picture (because Hiko let him) and ripped it to pieces, as he shoved them in the trash. Okina then stood there, trying to regain his composure as hiko grunted…..)

"Okina, why do you keep such things in your pocket? First a condom, now a picture. What's going to be next?"

"I don't mean to keep such things I my pocket Hiko, I just forget their in there."

"Ha, and 'The Great Okina' never forgets?"

"Oh yea, um…that…anyways I have to announce this week's fifteenth song remember!" Okina declared, trying to change the subject.

(Okina then reached into his pocket, and looked to see if it was the right piece of paper. He then had a smile and pulled out the piece of paper and announced…..)

"This week's number fifteenth song is………...Yuukyuzan Anji with his song called 'Photograph'!"

(The audience cheered again as the same-old-pop-out-of-nowhere-T.V, rolled onto the stage. The video started out with a man holding out a photograph, while singing 'Look at this photograph'.)

"How the hell am I supposed to see what the hell that photograph was?" Hiko yelled.

"SHHH!"

(Hiko looked to the audience, who were the ones telling him to shush. He then pouted and grunted softly….)

"Probably another photo of Okina…."

(Speaking of Okina, he was also puzzling what the picture was as well. But he decided to forget it as the video then was over, as the T.V. rolled back behind. Okina and Hiko now took the stage and Okina announced……)

"That was our fifteenth song this week on the countdown!"

"Woo", Hiko sarcastically cheered.

(But the crowd cheered loudly as usual. But that was then disturbed as Hiko said to Okina….)

"Hey Okina, wasn't that guy a priest or something?"

"Actually Hiko, that man was a fallen monk. But now he's arrested for twenty years in prison."

"Why, did he make-out with god or something? But anyway Okina, he's a priest."

"Sadly no Hiko, he's most indeed a monk".

"No, he's a priest."

"No he's a monk".

"Priest"

"Monk"

"Priest"

(The audience looked back and forth as usual, since Okina and Hiko always fought about something each time they were on stage. But the argument got louder and louder.)

"HE'S A FUCKING PRIEST OKINA!"

"NO HIKO, HE'S A MONK!"

"ALRIGHT THAT'S IT, THE ONLY WAY WERE GONNA SETTLE THIS IS TO ASK THE AUDIENCE!"

(At what hiko yelled, the audience paled. They really didn't want to get involved in their arguments, since they did want to leave this show in one piece that is. So they all stared at Hiko while he announced, or yelled in this case.)

"ALRIGHT, WHOEVER AGREE'S THAT HE'S A MONK, RAISE A DORITO CHIP IN THE AIR! IF YOU BELIEVE HE'S A MONK, RAISE A POTATO CHIP IN THE AIR!"

(The audience all thought about which chip to raise, while one teenager boy asked…)

"Umm, what if we don't have either chip, um…, sir?"

"WELL THEN THAT JUST MEANS YOU DON'T GET TO VOTE," Okina now yelled, getting into this game Hiko invented.

"Yea, um, how about if I use a salt and vinegar chip instead of a potato chip," asked another teenager boy.

"Did I say to use a salt and vinegar chip…..kid..," Hiko replied slowly.

"N-n-o s-sir," the boy shakily replied.

"THEN SIT YOUR ASS DOWN, AND SHUT THAT GOD DAMN HOLE IN YOUR FACE!"

(The force of Hiko's scream was so loud, that it knocked the kid right back into his seat, with all of his hair sticking up as if he got electrocuted. The rest of the audience saw this and quickly threw either chip up, just to get this over with. Okina and Hiko surveyed the crowd, to count the number of chips.)

"Hmm, let's see, one….two….three…" Hiko counted.

"Wait there a sec Hiko, that chip you counted was a potato chip", Okina corrected him.

"No it was a dorito"

"No it was a potato chip"

"Dorito!"

"Potato!"

(The audience then wailed as they are now having another argument, not even finishing the one before. Hiko then pointed a finger at Okina, while barking loudly…)

"LISTEN OKINA, FIRST WE ARGUE ABOUT IF THE OTHER GUY WAS A DRUG ATTIC OR SOMETHIN, THEN WE ARGUE ABOUT THIS GUY ABOUT IF HE'S A PRIEST OR A MONK, AND NOW WERE ARGUING ABOUT THIS BULLSHIT ABOUT DORITO'S AND POTATO CHIPS! "

"WHY DON'T YOU STICK ALL THIS DRUG-OPIUM-PRIEST-MONK-DORITO-POTATO CHIP- CRAP, AND STICK IT UP YOUR ASS!"

(The audience's hair was all up, just like the before….who was unconscious at the moment. Okina then laughed like crazy, and so did Hiko. The audience looked at them, as if they crazy. Okina also had his hair up just like the others as well, while saying…..)

"Well, that was our week's number fifteenth song, but stay tune to now who…is number one!"

"Oh…..god…..I think….I'm out of…..breath…"Hiko breathlessly said as he passed out. Okina looked at him and then back at the audience and said….

"Yes, please do stay tune…..but in one piece please…"

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	6. Chapter 6

MTV's Top Twenty countdown

By: Kelli St. Pierre……………………………………….sadly I do not own Rurouni Kenshin……..

* * *

"And welcome back to MTV's Top Twenty Countdown!"

(The audience applauds as all of their snacks were gone. Hiko stood next to Okina as he made said…)

"Well, I least I got to have some sake before we came back to this jack-ass show."

"Well that's good Hiko, now we don't need to worry about your anger problem. Anywa-"

"What do you mean _anger problem_?" Hiko grunted.

"Oh nothing Hiko, it's just that when you don't have your sake……..you get…..PMS"

"What the fuck! Okina who or _what_ do you think I am! I'm not just some little girl you have in your sick clouded head am I!"

(While Okina and Hiko argue; the audience, once again, sits their and looks back and forth towards one to the other.)

"Of course not Hiko, I would never picture you as a girl"

"And how am I to believe that?"

"Because, you'd be a pretty ugly girl"

"THAT'S BECAUSE I'M A GUY YOU DIP-SHIT!"

(The audience laughs out loud at that and Hiko then has a mischief smile on his face. So Hiko continued on rambling….)

"Unlike you Okina, the woman you probably had sex with last night was probably a guy in disguise!"

"She was not a guy!" Okina defended, "I could clearly see and _feel_, that it was definitely a woman."

"Are you sure Okina, or were you just feeling yourself then?"

"Ha hah ha hah, real funny Hiko, but if you don't mind I have a show to run thank you!"

"And what do you think we've been doing for the past couple of hours?"

"We've been wasting time that's what. Don't you agree with me audience?"

(The audience all nodded their heads yes and Hiko had to snort. Okina raised his chin high and smile proudly at himself, while Hiko grunted……)

"These people don't even know what the hell a good show is….."

"Anyways, its time I announce this week's fourteenth song!"

"Oh wait Okina" Hiko announced, "Are you sure you want me to get it from your pocket, who knows what else you'll pull from in their…"

(The audience laughed louder this time as okina was mimicking what Hiko said…)

"_Okina are sure you want me to get it….._hmm…no thank you Hiko, that won't be necessary."

"Okina, I do not sound like that. You make a crappy version of me"

"Whatever, anyways, its time to announce this week's number fourteenth song!"

(The audience goes wild as Okina reaches in his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper. Okina sees the paper and smiles. Okina announces….)

"Alright, this week's number fourteenth song is………Yumi Komagata with her song called 'Dip it low'!"

(The audience screams loudly as the T.V. pulls up and is on.)

"Finally we have a woman singer", Hiko grunts to himself, "I though we were going to have all guys or guys or even all gay guys on our countdown."

(The T.V shows a woman dancing on a stage with all other girls behind her.)

"Dip it low, pick it up slow….."

(While the video was playing, Okina was mimicking the dance moves they were doing in the video while sing it to himself. Hiko and the audience looked at him and all of them rolled their eyes.)

"I really should get this on camera…" Hiko said.

(The video was then over and the T.V was pulled back as Okina and Hiko took the stage. Okina stood straight and acted like nothing happened back there and announced…..)

"Alright that our week's fourteenth song!"

"Oh I'm sorry Okina, I'm confused, but was the fourteenth song really Yumi, or was it really you back there?"

"Oh no…..it was really yumi. He he he he…."

"Right……o hey, wasn't that chick that mummy's girlfriend or whatever."

"Oh yes she was, she was very loyal to Shishio too."

"Hmm, to me, she's completely wasting her time with that guy. Instead she should be with a man like me, instead of that mummy back there. I mean, come on, who really knows that he's a guy, he could really be a girl"

"Well, I can agree with you there Hiko, but I have to disagree with the whole her being with you thing."

"And why it that?"

"Well because shouldn't she disserve a better man Hiko, like me for instance."

(At this, the ground and Hiko were cracking up laughing. Okina had a confused look on his face as Hiko said to him….)

"Ha hah, you really think that you're the _man_ for her. Okay Okina, I agree with you. Maybe you and her can both dip it low like you were doing before. Ha hah, or maybe she even could pull out all the weird things in your pockets, ha hah ha hah."

"That's not funny Hiko!"

"Oh, well the audience doesn't agree with you Okina."

(Just as Hiko said, they didn't. The audience was cracking up laughing at this. Hiko found this to fun to stop, so he continued on.)

"Alright, how about we ask how the audience feels about this shall we?"

(Everyone's hand was up in a flash. Hiko looked around and had his eyes on a teenage girl who looked eighteen.)

"Alright, you with the big boobs, you can say something."

"Well……….I LOVE YOU HIKO!"

"I know, I know, who doesn't. Anyways, what do you think of Okina and Yumi getting it on."

"Like ew, Okina is way too old for her. Plus, she's way too gorgeous."

"I'm what!", Okina yelled.

"Quiet Okina, Thank you, you may sit down now."

(The girl smiled sweetly and sat back down. Hiko observed the crowd again and found another girl who was instead twenty-five.)

"Alright, you with the big fat ass, you stand up."

(The woman was so happy, that when she got up, the chair went up with her as well. So the woman stood and said, while the chair was still attached to her big butt.)

"He he he, well, I think that Okina is way too perverted and stupid to be with Yumi."

"What? Hey I'll have you know I was a spy one time, and a pretty hot one at that!'

"Yea Okina, and the key word there is _was_ a spy, so shut your pie-hole."

(The lady sat back down and Hiko observed the crowd again. He saw an old lady who looked fifty in the crowd and wondered what the hell a fifty year old woman would be doing on this show. So he asked her.)

"Um, you with the drool hanging out of your mouth."

(The woman didn't say anything but just kept on staring ahead, Hiko couldn't see her eyes since she was wearing black glasses. Hiko raised an eyebrow.)

"Ms. Um…..old lady, are you there."

(The old lady just sat there with drool hanging out. Then the huge gunk of drool then feel to the floor with a slat sound. A loud ew was heard from the audience. Hiko as well looked disgusted as he scrunched his eyes in disgust. But then the women opened her mouth and said….)

"It took me twenty years to find out my husband was gay…."

(Everyone, even Okina, laughed there socks off. The woman just sat there and again started to drool like nothing happened. Hiko laughed and yelled out…)

"Oh hey everyone, Okina I guess now has a lover!

"What? There's no way I'm going out with that old thing!"

"Look who's talking Okina."

(The audience also agreed with Hiko as Okina pouted. Okina grumpily said….)

"Well, that was our week's fourteenth song this week……and stay tune. Hiko do you have anything to say…"

"You all suck cock."


	7. Chapter 7

MTV's Top Twenty Countdown

By: Kelli St. Pierre………………….and sadly I do not own Rurouni Kenshin…….

* * *

"Welcome back to MTV's Top Twenty Countdown!"

(The audience applause as Hiko grunts out…….)

"Oh god….during the break I actually had a dream that this wasn't real……guess wishes don't come true…."

"Oh Hiko don't be like that, all wishes come true..," Okina said cheerfully, "You just really need to wish hard that's all. Like on the wizard of Oz when Dorothy wanted to go home."

"Hmmm, Okina, there is no way I'm tapping my toes together and saying….'There's no place like home'…" Hiko replied back to Okina, while Hiko said the last part sarcastically, "I don't care how desperate I am, I'll never do anything such as that……that would be a disgrace to all men…."

"Hmm, I must agree Hiko that would be"

"Oh my god Okina, is this finally something we agree about…."

"Hmm, your sarcasm is amusing Hiko, really, but if you don't mind I have a show to run.."

"Humph….like anyone is watching it…."

(Okina decided to let that one slide as he took out a piece of paper from his pocket and announced…..)

"Alright, so who wants me to announce this week's

(The audience cheered as Hiko had a flag in his hand that said 'woo' on it while saying……..)

"Woo….I'm so excited….."

"Alright this week's number thirteenth song is……….Usui Uonuma with his song called 'A Little Bit'!"

(The audience roared loudly as the same T.V. popped up on the stage, as the video started to come on. While it started, Hiko looked at the guy confused as Okina was trying to act pimp……but wasn't doing it very good. They sang along with the words while some danced. When the video was over, Hiko and Okina took back the stage as the crowd cheered.)

"Well, that was our week's number thirteenth song!" Okina announced as the crowd cheered.

"Hey I have a question" HIko stated.

"And what would that be Hiko?" Okina asked.

"How the hell could that guy see if he was blind?"

"Well Hiko, he can because he has what he calls 'eye of the heart' so that's how he sees so well."

"'Eye of the heart'…..? Who the hell made up that load of shit? He should call it 'eye of the dumbass' to me…."

(The crowd laughed loudly at Hiko's comment, all except for Okina that is….)

"Now, now Hiko, he was a very difficult opponent to beat in battle."

"Yes Okina your right, he does win in his battles…when they say Polo that is" Hiko declared, "The only thing that son of a bitch is good at is playing Marco Polo dam it".

"Now Hiko, don't be rude, you could offend some peoples feelings here you know…."

"Oh come on Okina, what blind person is ever going to come to this crack ass show."

"Me!"

(Everybody looked back towards the back of the stage as a janitor was there. The janitor held his broom his hand while saying…..)

"I come to this station every single day…..cleaning this floor, the chairs….everything. And what do I get in return, I get a nickname, a fucking nickname called 'TBD' which stands for 'The Blind Dude' they call me."

"Damn….you've been on this show for every single day, man I feel bad for you. And here I can't even handle on day…." Hiko said amazed…

"Shhh Hiko, were having a moment here….." Okina silenced him.

"Oh sorry…"

"Anyways, I'm always sick and tired of people judging us janitors just because of our jobs we have. Well I've never told somebody something, but I'm goona tell you somethin. During my job, people think guys like us smoke crack, scratch our asses, go to clubs and get laid, and pick our noses…..Well I'm gonna tell you that I have done of those things,……well, maybe the smoke crack part. But it was only one day!"

(After the janitor said that, he ran out of the stage from the back door. Everyone stood there, all had sad looks on their faces. Hiko stood there when he tilted his head slightly, then looked back at the audience and Okina while he said….)

"Okay, I'd like to say that no one runs more like a girl than he just did.."

(At this, the audience started bursting out laughing. Okina started laughing to as Hiko laughed as well. Okina relaxed from laughing and then had strange face on. Hiko noticed this and looked at him and said…..)

"What the hell is wrong with you gramps. What did you shit your pants or something?"

"No Hiko, it's just that….I lost the microphone…"

(Lots of gasps were heard from the audience as Hiko replied…..)

"So? Why don't you just talk without your microphone?"

"Because Hiko,….. The microphone is my mojo!"

"…..Repeat that?..."

"Hiko, my style, my coolness,…..everything comes from the microphone!"

(Hiko looked at Okina strangely as he replied back….)

"Okina, when were you ever _cool _or _in style_?"

"Hiko, there's no time for this, we must find it now!"

(So the to of them went searching for it as the audience looked as well. Okina was beginning to worry as Hiko looked under a box and saw it. He silently kicked it under more and put the box over it to hide it.)

"Have you seen it yet Hiko!" Okina yelled from the other end of the stage.

"Nope, haven't seen it at all", Hiko said sweetly.

(After about ten minutes, Okina finally found the remote and looked over at Hiko and said…)

"Hiko! It was right next to you!"

"Hmm, how odd" Hiko replied smoothly.

(Okina was about to reply back until he saw a piece of paper on the floor. He took it and then laughed his socks off. Hiko was interested and looked at it; Hiko paled. The picture showed Hiko way back when he was in his twenty's with only a pair of pink boxer's on him. He also had a little mustache as well.)

"HA HAH HA HAH, HIKO HAS PINK BOXER'S ON. HAH HA HAH HA AND HE HAS A MUSTACHE TOO!" Okina roared hysterically.

(The crowd also laughed hysterically has Hiko took the picture and put it in one of his deep inside coat pockets. Okina had somewhat calmed himself down as he said……)

"Well..ha….that was our week's number thirteenth song….and ha. Hey Hiko, got a…ha…anything to say…"

(But Hiko wasn't paying attention to Okina but instead had his feet together and his arms at his side. He tapped his shoes together while he said…..)

"There's no place like home….there's no place like home…….with my sake…"


	8. Chapter 8

MTV's Top Twenty Countdown

By: Kelli St. Pierre…………………………….sadly I do not own Rurouni Kenshin...

* * *

"And welcome back to MTV's Top Twenty Countdown!"

(The fans cheered loudly as they all clapped as well. But the fans stop and suddenly look around cause they realize Hiko isn't here…..)

"Hey! Where's my little Hiko baby!" A girl who was twelve yelled.

"Um, well that's a good question….um…miss" Okina replied.

"Yea, what happen to the sexy man?" A woman yelled from the audience, who looked twenty-one.

"Um, well what are you talking, your _sexy man_ is right here!", Okina said proudly.

"Yea, the day when you're the sexy man, will be the day I blow shit out of my mouth….." The woman replied back.

(Okina was about to say something else until they all heard a loud noise. They looked around wondering what it was, until they saw a big figure walk in and stand right next to Okina.)

"OH MY GOD! HIKO'S BACK!" The twelve year old girl said as she had hearts for eyes. Well, just about all the girls had hearts for eyes as they all looked at Hiko. But Hiko wasn't paying attention to then and said to Okina……

"God Okina, couldn't you at least make good bathrooms here. Its already bad enough that you have a jackass show running, but now you got shitty bathrooms. How the hell is a man supposed to express himself in there……"

"Hmm, whatever you say Hiko…." Okina replied calmly.

(At this Hiko looked around and noticed all the girls looking at him. He moved his eyes to the right, then to the left (His right and left). When he moved his eyes one direction, all the girls on the other side would try and move over, to see his eyes. Hiko finally said….

"What are you all staring at? Do you all have staring problems or something…..?"

(He could hear, and see, all the girls giggling at him. He snorted at this and went back to Okina, while he said softly to himself…..)

"Stupid girls and their PMS, and their hormones or whatever…."

"Anyways…" Okina said loudly, getting slightly annoyed at all the looks at Hiko and not him, "It's time to start this show, with me reading this week's number twelve song!"

(The audience cheered loudly as Okina had already token out a piece of paper. Hiko knew something was up, since Okina had a smile before he even opened it, but he didn't say anything as Okina announced……)

"This weeks number twelfth song is………….none other than Okina, which is me, with my song called…….'We be burinin'!"

(The audience cheered loudly, yet were slightly confused, as the same T.V popped up and rolled onto the stage. The video started as Hiko said softly to Okina……)

"You knew it this whole time didn't you…."

(Okina just smiled an evil smile as Okina was doing his dance moves that were like the videos. The audience saw this and then copied him, so all the people were dancing except Hiko. Hiko looked around here and said to himself……)

"Umm….yea…how about….no."

(The video then was over as they all sat in their seats. Okina ten took back the stage as he announced….)

"And this was this week's number twelfth song!"

(Applause was heard as Okina had his hands up trying to quiet the crowd. Hiko just stood there next to him, yawning away. When Okina finally settled the crowd, he also announced……"

"And today is not over yet! Today is another Double Day!"

(The crowd went ballistic at this as Hiko could only yawn more. Okina quieted the crowd again as he went into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. Okina announced….)

"Alright, this weeks number eleventh song is………… none other than the Black eyed peas, who are also known as Omasu, Shiro, Kuro, and Okon, with their song called 'Don't funk with me heart'!"

(The audience cheered yet again as the T.V. pulled up and the video started. Hiko knew this was going to be interesting, since these people in the video grew up with Okina. Okina all the while was looking at the video with water in his eyes, as he said quietly to himself….)

"Oh, I've trained them so well….there all grown up…"

"Oh give me a fucking break.." Hiko said softly.

(By now the video was at the part where a woman slapped a man for grabbing another girl's ass. Hiko looked at it and said to Okina…)

"Why the hell did he grab the ugly woman's butt instead of the hot chick that was with him?"

"Well, Hiko, it wasn't that he meant to. It was that he was controlled by the other person …." Okina replied back quietly.

"Sure that's what they all say….."

(By now the video was over as the T.V. was rolled away, as Hiko and Okina took the stage. Okina announced…..)

"And that was our eleventh song!"

"Woo, I don't care…." Hiko said sarcastically.

(But the audience really cheered as they clapped again as well. Okina quieted them down as Hiko said to Okina……)

"Okina, aren't those people the people whom you raised?

"You are correct Hiko, I indeed trained them to be the best ninja's they are" Okina said proudly as he had his chin up.

"Yea, I can tell they were from you just by there dance moves."

"You know what Hiko, you always complain how everyone dances wrong. Why don't you then show us how to dance, if your so good at it…"

(All the girls were practically saying yes as they were leaning way forward on their chairs, with wide eyes and wide open mouths. Hiko just replied back to Okina smoothly….)

"I never said I was good at it…"

(Okina then had his chin down as the girls then looked disappointed, but not until Hiko said softly….)

"But I'll show you…."

(The crowd went wild, or should I say the girls, as Hiko moved up more saw the Audience can see him better.)

"Alright, I'll have you know that this is the stance of the Hitenmisurugi style".

(The girls awed as Okina was starting to regret this. Hiko had his arms out in front of him and parallel to each other as then with a flash Hiko started to dance something that Okina would not have imagined in years……)

"I'm…to sexy for my shirt, my shirt" Hiko said deeply, as the girls were then about to faint. Until Hiko took of his coat and the only thing underneath was a muscle shirt.

"Hiko! There is no stripping on television!" Okina yelled to him.

(But Hiko paid no attention as he continued his dance and he ripped of his muscle shirt, to have his chest bare. The girls then really fainted, as the woman were looking as it they ready to launch out of there seats.)

"Yea, yea, I'm….to sexy for my pants, my pants…"

(Okina had a horror look in his eyes as he saw Hiko reach for his belt at his waist. But the women were exactly the opposite, who had fire in there eyes that looked as if they wanted to rip his pants of as well….)

"HIKO! DON'T YOU EVEN DARE!" Okina roared at him. HIko just smiled at him as he said laughing….

"Please Okina, I was only joking. Did you really think I was going to take my pants off on television. That would be a disgrace to all men…"

"Oh, and what you did now was not a disgrace to men.."

"Nope, its only a disgrace Okina if it doesn't _work_, but clearly as you see the woman here….I think it worked. Though that's no surprise since I am after all, the master of the Hitenmitsurugi Style."

"Hmm, show off."

"Well don't worry Okina, the only time I really do that is went I fucking screw a chick."

(Okina closed his eyes tightly as he had images in his head and wanted them to go very badly. Hiko all the while was smiling as the woman wanted his autograph. The girls would have asked to, if they were awake since their still fainted.)

"Well, that was our week's number not only twelfth, but eleventh as well! But you must stay tune, cause next up, will be the top ten!"

"You know what, for once, I actually enjoyed being here" Hiko said, as a woman was giving him a back rub……and still with his shirt off…….

* * *

Okay, so after this chap., then the new is comin up so now the people who have already read this and all, the next chappie is the real new one. I'm real sorry for the trouble i have cause and i hope you all dont kill me. So i hop i have reviews from u all and stay tune for the top ten!...:)


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